There is something special about a smiling face. I believe that a smile is the beginning of laughter and laughter is a lifeline connected to the soul. Laughter causes the soul to rejoice. When you smile at someone and they smile back, it makes their world ok…. if only for a moment. When someone starts laughing, it can become contagious. A smile is a natural connection between every soul. A smile can change a thought, change an attitude, re-direct an action, alter a mood and plant a seed of joy. The smile of child is brighter than a thousand suns.


You’re Smile Your smile runs through me like a warm strike of lighting, waking up every part of me. There is nothing and no one like your smile. When you smile, you humble my knees and my heart. Your smile overwhelms my spirit in love. When you smile, you make my soul smile. Your smile gets me through it all in a blink of an eye. When you smile, instantly, life gets better. You smile embrace my everything. When you smile, the joy of the Lord is truly my strength and I can go on.

Your smile…. I thank God for your smile

If I could turn back our time


Out of all the moments I spent with you, my last day with you stuck in my mind the most. The place where you stood, standing at the door as if cement was holding your feet in place. You held my face in your hands as if you were trying to hold my soul together. I don’t’ remember the time… time stood still as you said your goodbyes. I don’t remember the day… it was night. A night that I’ll never forget for the rest of my life. I don’t remember word for word what you tried to say but I remember your reasons. You wanted to do the right thing for the wrong reasons but you couldn’t do me anymore. I remember the tears that ran down your face. After all these years, I miss you in my life. If I could turn back time… you till would not have chosen me.

A Stranger


The beauty I see in you, maybe it was the beauty of the beholder, me. I wanted to look in your eyes to search your soul but today. I don’t want the truth to be known you’re “Hello” was enough to last till I never see you again. Your presents, brought comfort to my heart of what love could be. It was truly a blessing just to behold your face… You were like a beautiful butterfly passing me by. I just wasn’t sure if I wanted the pain you would bring into my life. All I could think about was, the bad would outweigh the good. I wanted to say something to make you stop in your track and make you notice me. A part of me wanted to step into your world and show you that my love could change your life. But the fact of the matter was, I’m not what you’re use too. I’m not your normal choice. I missed the moment to speak; I missed the moment to make you love me. I missed the chance to prove myself wrong and see if you were Mr. Right. I missed a beginning by trying to save my heart from a hurtful end I miss what I could have had

My Mother


I see why my mother walked with her head down sometimes; remembering the cracks in the sidewalks and the rocks on the ground; occasionally glancing up to see which way she was going; feeling like her today’s being no different than your yesterdays. She was only left with memories & regret as if time itself was already set.

I understand my mother tears …the tears that ran down my mother’s face …the tears that only filled her eyes …..the tears she held inside and the tears she couldn’t cry. I understand the Tears that soothe her soul and ease the heart …. tears that fell when feelings that had no words and words had no meaning … tears that restored strength….. yesterday tears that had pride. I know the love of her heart and depth of her soul, the spirit of “knowing” and the wisdom of a woman a thousand years old.

I live the life of my mother; my heart beats at the rhythm of her soul, my steps…a continuation of her journey. I am my mother’s child. I see why my mother walked with her head down sometimes.


Moma, I Miss You Mom would make us go to church. I didn’t understand and I didn’t know why, I just remember Mom sitting in church and crying…. tears constantly running down her face. Through her beautiful smile, her deep dimples peering her jaws, I saw so much pain in her eyes and pain written all over her face. My mother’s eyes are

My mother’s eyes are reason that I don’t look into my own eyes… the pain is the same. Sorrow embedded in our souls. I miss Mom’s touch, her laughter. I miss her stoking my hair as she combed it; sleeping at the bottom of her bed curved about her feet; the way she cared for me with so much love when I was sick. I miss her calling me from across the world when she felt something was wrong. I miss her being in the world, being somewhere but never too far away.

I miss my Mom just being Mom. One mother, per life time… if I had only known… I’d treated her like a Queen. Oh, how I wish that I could reach back in my past and her wipe away your tears and hold her in my arms once more. I wish that I had the chance to appreciate her mercy, sacrifices and forgiveness. I wish that my youth had not blinded me; I wish I had known how much she needed me. I spent most of my adult life trying to keep from saying those words that hunted her “I wish I would have.” I’ve cried her tears days, nights, years… My dreams — Faded. My hopes–Weary. My heart —Scared. My needs—Unfulfilled. Mom my children need you so much. I’m tired. My way is dark but my hands are in God’s hands.

It’s hard to show my children God’s love and how God work things out when things are constantly falling apart. Somehow Mom they still believe. I wish I had been there for you like your love was always there for me. You’re gone and I have so many regrets, things I can’t undo and so many words I can’t unsay. When I was child and felt misunderstood, I said that wished you were died… I’m sorry for my foolish ways, a childish mind and a naive heart. I end my letter as you’ve always ended yours to me. Please overlook my mistakes. I’m a work in progress.


Communication: I don’t think that people realize that words are all they have with each other. I’ve found that people arguer to keep from talking, for, if they talk, someone has to tell the truth, admit a lie or face their wrong-head-on. Communication is listening without thinking about what you want to say; not listening for words to use against the person who’s talking; listen and try to hear what’s really being said. Communication is talking to someone, not talking at someone. In listening, some words may hurt but give that person a chance to say something to make your heart feel better.

From My Heart: It takes love and caringness to address important situations with patience and understanding; to be able to able to discuss issues that matters most to you; to not be quick to augur but talk calmly; to not be assume you know what the other person has to say and rudely cut them off. It takes a sincere man or woman to sit down and talk about matters of the heart. Communication starts with being honest with yourself and your mate. Secrets and lies damage the communication of love.

Some people don’t want to listen- when you listen, that means that you are responsible for what you hear. Listening takes sacrifice, control, humbleness and a willingness to change. Listening could take the relationship to a higher-deeper level. Much love comes more responsibilities.

Love and care enough to listen to each other’s thoughts, ideals, opinions and emotions. Learn to communicate in a healthy way. Try to see and hear things from a different perspective. Communication takes compromise, understanding and mercy on both parts. Think first, choose your words carefully and pray that your words are received with understanding.

Broken Spirited

Broken Spirited Defined: When the doors are closed in your face too many times; When hard times last a little too long; When problems come a little too often; When nothing good ever last; When no one is ever there for you when you need them the most; When your worst outweigh your bad and there is no comfort in your nights or days…A broken spirit …. your faith become thin as the skin of a dry leaf; your spirit grows weary and your prayers fade in the ceiling; tears harden your heart; your strength feels like it left your body to defend for itself; you’re emotions becomes numb; your mind is at stand still like stagnate water and your soul broken into a million pieces.
Your what-ever-attitude says that you have given up. You go to church and can’t lift your hands to give God praise. You want to speak life to your situation but your lips won’t move. You’ve given up trying to make it work because all your hopes are gone. You listen to people trying to say things to encourage you but you can’t hear them. Your eyes are open but you can’t see. Going through the motions of everyday life and nobody sees your pain. Tears behind the smile and hurt behind the laughter. Your prayers are short and to the point because you don’t feel that God hears you. All your memories of hurt, pain and all the bad things drown your spirit. And you find yourself mad at God to only find that satan had a plan for you before you were born and your people in your past and your own choices played a part in his plan.



Loneliness isn’t a sickness that medication or drugs can curse. It’s powerful and deep, overwhelming and endless feeling. Loneliness, in a room filled with a 1000 people….it stands. In a smiling face, it’s there. In the sound of laughter, the loneliness echoes. In silence, loneliness speaks loudly. In the midst of devoted love, it’s there. Loneliness gives being alone a whole new meaning. When someone leaves you alone, only their presence has left from within your reach. When someone fails to nurture your soul and fail to hear your silent cry and aching heart… When someone can’t see you for who you are, then Love is lonely. No matter how you spell it, say it, deny it, hide it…..Loneliness doesn’t feel good to the soul. Only when God’s grace and love fills the heart, than being alone isn’t lonely.
My Reality: Loneliness was the one spirit I couldn’t bear. God had mercy and took it away. I could make it through hurt, being alone, suicidal thoughts, abuse, lost, mistreatment, being homeless, satanic attacks, any fear that tormented me but loneliness was worst than living and dying.